!!!!!!! Mr. MISANTHROPIC !!!!!

I wish hurricane Noel would turn into land tomorrow, right around mid-morning, so all the cracker-ass cross racers at Farmington will finally find out what a real race is like. 

Surf’s up assholes!

I also wish these things:

• that some of my hair would grow back
• I had a bigger dick
• I could move to Germany or Italy and be a race car driver

I’m going to stop racing my bike.

Gonna take up shopping at Wal-Mart and eating lots of food that’s bad for me. I want to contribute to the demise of myself and the planet at the same time.

Time to cash in and start living the good life.

All you hipster, bike racing, croc-wearing greenies can stuff it.